We’re at the end of 2023. I’m in goal setting mode right now. But if you know me, you know I’m never really out of goal setting mode.
It can be annoying, or at least that’s what I’ve been told by select members of my family. When we go on vacation, I have vacation goals. When we visit our family, I have relationship goals. When my kids spend the night at their friends’ house, I remind them: the goal is that you’re so polite that they want to invite you back one day.
I might be mis-using the word “goals.” In reality, I have high high expectations, hopes, and standards that I’d like to get out of my experiences. My motivation is pretty simple: I don’t want to sleepwalk through life.
We’ve got this amazing gift called life. Think of everything that had to happen for you to be sitting where you are today. It’s really incredible.
And I know life hasn’t been easy. I know there’ve been some disappointments, poor choices, regrets, and failures. (Believe me, I know.) And you’re still here!!
Let’s make 2024 The Year of Transformation. Let’s choose to find a new path forward – and that doesn’t mean you’ve got to radically transform your life. Choose an area: your health, your career, a relationship, your happiness, or your mindset. Sign up for my Year of Transformation communications, too, so you can stay “in the know” and keep me posted, too, on your progress.
And in regard to goal setting, I’ve got some ideas on how you can really commit to a goal this year and achieve it in a measured, sustainable fashion. I like to approach goals this way before I dare put them in a SMART goal format. That way, I understand what’s driving my decision and I ensure my goals enhance my overall quality of life so I’m more balanced.
Find the Right Motivation. When you set goals, ask “Why” five times. Really get to the root of why this goal is important to you. Without this level of curiosity, you might find you’ve got the wrong motivation and therefore might set the wrong goal.
Adopt a Kaleidoscope Approach. In my book Bet on You, I write about a kaleidoscope being a great metaphor for our lives: multiple chambers, balanced chips in each chamber, makes a beautiful picture. Same goes for our life. We’re more than our career – think of the four chambers in life as our career, family, sense of personal joy, and our community impact. Set goals in each chamber to create a more harmonized life.
Abandon “All or Nothing” Thinking – I had a liberating experience last year. It was during Lent when I committed to giving up chocolate and wine, with a twist. I gave up chocolate entirely, but for wine? I decided that I didn’t want to rob my life of complete joy – I travel a ton, meet up with old friends, and completely enjoy a glass of wine with my girls. So I decided to give up 90% of my wine consumption. It made me realize that with goals I don’t have to be so absolute – increasing or decreasing a behavior marks change in a positive direction. So don’t worry about being perfect – it’s okay to try!
Best of luck to you, too, as you finish strong this year! And if you have to crawl across the finish line? My hope is that you have the holiday break of your dreams … and you commit to a different kind of race next year because this one sounds like it’s a little much, agreed?
Here To Help Us Get Gutsy
GUEST Vernice ‘Flygirl’ Armour
December 7, 2023
It’s always a great day when I get to connect with a fellow Marine Corps Officer. Vernice “FlyGirl” Armour is a trailblazer: first black woman combat pilot. She’s also an endless source of wisdom and inspiration. “V,” as her friends call her, helps us get gutsy – the key to overcoming obstacles in our lives that prevent us from pursuing our dreams. If something stands between you and your goal, tune into this episode! You’ll learn how to become unstoppable.
Fun Things I’m Doing this Holiday Season
I celebrate Christmas, and I know not everyone does.
Regardless of your faith, I know one thing: we like making our holidays feel special to those around us. Part of that is creating anticipation for something great to come. In that spirit, this year I’m celebrating the 12 Days of Christmas with my two boys. Each morning I’m going to give them either a cup of flavored hot cocoa or a pair of holiday socks. They’ll love the surprise and, believe me, this will be a surprise because they don’t subscribe to Rally Cry. After all, I’m mom … what do I know about anything? What could they possibly learn from me? 🙂
